In Which I Totally Waste Your Time

Apparently, I’ve been taking a writing hiatus. I wish I could say it’s because I’ve been holed up in my office scribbling down all kinds of brilliancy for a New York Times’ bestseller I’ll be releasing in May. But, really, I’ve been holed up in my bedroom watching endless hours of Gilmore Girls (dang you, Netflix and your auto play).

(Okay, that’s not ALL that’s been detracting from my writing… I just finished teaching two classes, taking a trip to Knoxville, and researching and applying to two graduate schools… but there have also been many, many hours of those fast-talking, witty Gilmore girls. I feel like we would’ve been friends if I had lived in Stars Hollow.)

Also, I may or may not be in a bit of a writing slump, if those exist… frankly, if you want my opinion (and you do, given that you’re reading my blog), I don’t think writing slumps have anything to do with writing. As long as we are conscious and have control of our fingers and have at least one thought in our brains, we can write. When we feel like we can’t, we’re just lying to ourselves, saying, in actuality, that we won’t. Why we won’t is a whole ‘nother question, and the answer is indicative of what kind of slump we are truly in. It’s never a writing slump.

(Is that enough random psychology for you? That’ll be $150, and I’ll be happy to file your insurance.)

Any who, my goal today was to write a piece on 1 Peter (or was it 2nd?), but, clearly, I’m not going to get there with a flitty opening like this. (Pretty sure I just made that word up. It’s the adjective form of the verb “flit”, in case you didn’t pick up on that. I don’t know why it isn’t already in existence, but, according to Merriam AND Webster, it isn’t.) (They wrote a dictionary together, you know.) (Actually, I have no idea if that’s true. They may have written dictionaries independently of one another, and then, posthumously, some editor may have smashed them together and slapped both their names on it. Corporate America… am I right?) (Actually, I have no idea if it was published in America.)

All this to say, I’m not real sure when my next “typical” post will be published. I hope it’s soon. I’m breaking the two most essential blogging rules right now (simultaneously, no less, because I’m an overachiever like that): write regularly and only write posts that fit the mission and purpose of the blog. But it’s hard to follow those two rules whilst also following what I deem the most important rule of all: don’t write crap. (Actually, what I mean is don’t post crap. But, honestly, I lack the self control to not post everything I write. Lest we delve back into psychology to uncover why that is, how ’bout that use of “whilst”, huh?! I’m not real sure why that word died out… or maybe it hasn’t… maybe the British still use it? I don’t personally know any Brits, so I can’t ask them. Although, now that I think about it, there is a Brit who comes to Starbucks EVERY DAY with his black lab and drinks coffee whilst feeding his dog a cup of whipped cream, which I’m sure PETA is super pleased with. I could ask him to guesstimate his usage of the word “whilst”. Except we’ve never actually spoken. Maybe this could be the ice breaker – an American girl stereotyping him by asking him the oddest question ever. “Excuse me, sir. Do your people still use the word ‘whilst’, and, if so, approximately how often?” I’m pretty sure that would be the best way to develop a relationship with him in order to share the Gospel down the line. But just in case it’s not, maybe instead I’ll just ask you guys. Any of you Englishmen reading, can you please comment below as to whether or not you still use “whilst” and why? Inquiring minds want to know.)

(What if this becomes my most commented-on post of all time with folks posting their encounters with the word “whilst”? That would be equal parts awesome and depressing. No matter, don’t let that stop you from commenting; this is important linguistic research.)

So I’m guessing iDisciple won’t be republishing this particular post. I’m just hoping they don’t cancel my contract on account of the crazy they are reading right now (Hi, Editor Person! Just cleaning out my system. You know how it is… unless you don’t. In that case, I’ll just say writers are weird, and I know you know how that is).

Hey, thanks for hanging out with me while I amused myself for 800+ words. You are good friends. I hope you are amused, too. Happy Thanksgiving.

Advertisements

One thought on “In Which I Totally Waste Your Time

Share your thoughts

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s