It is no secret that I want to write and teach professionally.  I think I teach the gospel in a unique way that connects with people more personally than it usually does.  I get inside the scriptures and explain how they relate to me – an American woman in her 20’s – and you – a reader who is more interested in applying the scriptures than merely learning what they say.

I have a passion for communicating what the Bible actually says as opposed to what we think it says.  I want to help people understand that the scriptures are alive, not in a creepy mad-scientist kind of way, nor in an over-the-top religious nut-job kind of way, but, rather, in a life-giving, life-changing kind of way.

Right now I write this blog.  Tens of tens of people read it each week.  It speaks to them.

I also teach/facilitate two Bible studies for women at my church.  It’s not my material, but I pull out and highlight ideas for these small groups.  Dozens of people grow in their understanding of the Bible and in their relationships with the Lord.

I have the sneaking suspicion that, although my small-scale ministry is super important, God wants to do bigger things through me.

If I’m not careful, and I confess that I rarely am, I can get lost in the day dream of “What’s next?”  I can miss the reality of “What’s now.”

I can get overwhelmed with all the things I need to do to grow my blog.  I can become consumed with nailing down a book idea.  I can worry about how small my platform is and how impossible it seems to enlarge it.  I can get sucked into creating a social media presence and tweaking my website ad nauseum.  There is just so much to do and be and become in order to “make it” as a writer that, frankly, less than 5% of writers actually make it.

All of these thoughts swirled in me this morning as I came across an opportunity.  Women of Faith, an organization that publishes Christian books by women for women and holds conferences by these authors all over the country, has an annual writing contest.  They invite aspiring authors to submit a manuscript, and the winner gets published by Thomas Nelson, one of the largest Christian publishers, for free and may be asked to tour with Women of Faith.

In other words, this is the opportunity I’ve been waiting for.

The problem, however, is I haven’t settled on a book idea.  I have a couple of ideas floating around in my mind, but I don’t want to write about what I want to write about.  I won’t settle for my idea.  Mainly because I know it won’t work, or, at the very least, it will have very limited impact.  I refuse to write a book unless the idea is from the Lord.  His message is more important then any message I can come up with.

So pray with me that I will know what it is He wants me to write about.  Pray that I will not jump ahead and force my agenda into written form because He is taking “too long” to lead me.  And pray that I don’t miss “What’s now,” while I consider “What’s next.”