I Killed Jesus

In Revelation 12:10, we are told that Satan stands in Heaven, day and night, accusing us before God.  “Accusing us of what?” you might ask.  Job 1:9-11 indicates at least one thing Satan accuses believers of – not really loving God.  We’re only in it for the blessings, Satan says.  Day and night, Satan tries to convince God that we believers don’t love God for who He is; we love Him for what He gives us. 

And, from time to time, Satan is right.

All too often, I love God for what He does for me, not for who He is. 

I don’t have proof, but I have a hunch Satan accuses us of a lot more than being fair weather believers.  Like a tattling sibling, I think Satan tells God a million reasons why we deserve punishment.

“Kelly succumbed to that temptation today, Lord.  She doesn’t deserve Your love.”

“Kelly chose herself over You just now, Lord.  You shouldn’t bless her anymore.”

“Kelly deliberately disobeyed You, Lord.  She deserves Your wrath.”

On and on the Accuser goes, often making sure I am painfully aware of what he’s telling God.   The good news is Satan isn’t the only one petitioning the Lord.  The Bible tells believers, “If anybody does sin, we have one who speaks to the Father in our defense—Jesus Christ,” (1 John 2:1).

Right next to the Accuser, Jesus Himself is defending us!  He is saying, “Lord, I’ve paid for Kelly’s sins with my own blood.  She stands forgiven.  Bless her and love her as if she had never sinned in the first place,” (Hebrews 8:12; Romans 5:1-2). 

A mental battle ensues.  Am I going to believe what Satan says about me, “She is guilty!  She is guilty!”  Or am I going to believe what God says about me, “She is forgiven!  She is forgiven!”

Revelation 12:11 tells us Satan can be overcome by the blood of the Lamb.  When Satan tries to make you feel guilty for sin of which you’ve already repented, proclaim the forgiven state in which you perpetually live through Christ.  Also, let the idea that Christ had to give his very blood on account of our sinful choices motivate you to sin no more.  Sin is murderous.  It killed Christ!  Too often we think of our sins as harmless transgressions.  But the truth is Christ would never have been beaten and crucified if I, Kelly Levatino, had never sinned.  I don’t think it is taking it too far to say, in a way, I killed Jesus. 

And so did you.

Let that sink in.  Let it break your heart.  And let it motivate you to resist sin with renewed vigor. 

You can do it; He can help (1 Corinthians 10:13).

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3 thoughts on “I Killed Jesus

  1. You are on fire with the grace of God and I don't want to do anything to put out the blaze. Can anyone be more worthy of our love and worship than Jesus? Can anyone be more disheartened by our failure to realize how much He loves us?I am holy, holy, wholly Yours, Lord.

  2. If only I could acknowledge in every moment the great cost Jesus paid for me and ultimately how WORTHY HE IS TO PRAISE, how differently I might live my life moment to moment. So thankful for His grace, because I am surely without ability to stand on my own!

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