Everyone always says having 2 kids is more than twice the work. Maybe it’s because I am only 3 weeks into this, or maybe it’s because our second-born is our laid back child, but I feel WAY more put together emotionally this time around than I did when Lexi was born.
The first 3 months of Lexi’s life I was a basket case. The sheer stress of having a colicky baby scream her head off everyday for 3 months is enough to make anyone batty. She acted like she was in pain (probably acid reflux), and there was NOTHING I could do to soothe my newborn. Combine that with the sleep deprivation and physical exhaustion that accompany breast feeding, and I am sure I was certifiably insane.
Baby #2, on the other hand, is as laid back as they come. She sleeps about 20 hours a day and only cries when she’s hungry. I still don’t get any sleep, as I have to be up all night feeding Allie and up all day with Lexi, but I don’t feel as exhausted as I did when Lexi was born. Maybe it’s because I switched from Folger’s with Lexi to Maxwell House with Allie…
I’m sure having 2 1/4 yrs of mothering experience under my belt helps with my confidence, too. I have an arsenal of baby care knowledge to use on Allie, and, being the people-pleaser she is, she responds well to all of it.
And the amount of time I spend worrying about Allie is non-existent compared to how much I stressed over each and every decision I made with Lexi. I haven’t thought twice about SIDS, or proper car seat tightness, or letting her sleep in our bed occasionally. No, I am not being more reckless with Allie. I am just more comfortable in doing my best and letting God control the outcome. Her crib is completely SIDS proof, we don’t smoke, and she sleeps on her back… I could still choose to worry about her mysteriously dying in the middle of the night, but I’m not this time.
The true test to see if I have completely chilled out will be when I have to leave Allie in someone else’s care for an extended period of time, which probably won’t be until next year, when I’m done nursing her. Will I micro-manage that person, demanding that they do everything my way in my absence, and then worry the entire time I’m away that they AREN’T doing everything how I told them to, like I did with Lexi? Or will I barely stop the car long enough for Allie to get out? We’ll see!