Tag Archive | service

MythBusters: Faithful Failures

Mar2

There is a rumor going around in the hearts and minds of a lot of us that God can’t and won’t use us to positively change the world until we are better.

“Better” is different for all of us. Your “better” is directly related to your areas of weakness.

So, for the person with low self-esteem, she believes she has to be more self-confident before God will choose to use her to communicate His truth to others. She feels her negative self-image limits God’s ability to draw others to His Spirit through anything she might say or do.

The person without the graduate degree thinks she has to become smarter and more qualified before God will be able to change lives through her. This person feels her lack of knowledge limits God’s ability to use her to illuminate the Bible for others.

The person who perpetually struggles in the same old ways, year in and year out, thinks she has to defeat sin herself, once and for all, before the Lord will be able to do work through her. She feels her sinful tendencies limit God’s capabilities to spread the truth through her.

God help the person who feels she has to be “better” in all three of these ways at once. Whomever she might be…

Last week God exploded this “I have to be better before God will use me” myth. He brought 2 Corinthians 12:9 to life for me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”

It’d been a long week of mentally beating myself up for some choices I regretted, compounded by an unhealthy dose of Satan’s baiting me to believe his infamous mantra, “Trust your feelings.”

Feelings. Hmph.

To be honest, what I was feeling was confused and angry and bitter and depressed and unable to pull it all together. And I was slated to teach Bible study Thursday morning. Perfect.

(If you’re new here, please take the time to read sarcasm into my posts so they can be understood appropriately.)

I halfway knew how I was going to approach Thursday’s lesson on Hebrews 1-10. I was prepared enough, and I anticipated a decent morning in the scriptures, but nothing excessively fantastic given my state of mind.

I guess God took that as a subconscious dare because He descended on our group like a God with a purpose. He took control of the situation, tailoring the lesson to include a brief detour to examine the temptation of Jesus, living by faith, persevering, and the importance of scripture in all three of these areas.

In a weird sort of way, He used me to minister to me (and others), despite my being in such a crappy place emotionally and spiritually all week.

Myth busted.

I still don’t understand why or how, but it turns out God is not limited by our weaknesses. Not only can He use us when we’re at our worst, He does! We don’t have to be “better” to be counted worthy of His anointing. We just have to be available.

Lord, we fall so short of Your goal for us – to be made in Christ’s image (Romans 8:29). But You allow us the privilege and the blessing of Your working in us to share the love and truth of Christ with the world when we are open. Help us live wide open today.

 

 

 

Boundaries in Church

Feb18

image via CloudTownsend.com

Years ago a book called Boundaries was released. I haven’t read it, but I hear it helps you decide when relationships are harmful and how to enact healthy limits to prevent permanent damage to your soul. There have been a bunch of spin-offs – Boundaries in Dating, Boundaries in Marriage, Boundaries with Kids, etc.

To my knowledge, Boundaries in Church has yet to be written. But I’ve been considering the concept quite a bit lately.

I attend a large church in a Memphis suburb. Like most churches, our staff is over-worked and under-paid, and they rarely say no to meeting a need inside or outside of the church. In order to address all those needs, the staff constantly appeals to the church members for help (as they should).

I’ve heard it said that 20% of the people do 80% of the work, and I’m feeling it.

Week after week, I receive email after email with opportunities to serve inside and outside of my church. And every time I read a request, my first thought is, “How can I fit this in? How can I rearrange things to make room for more service?”

Similarly, I learn of financial needs within my small group, within my church family, within my community, and abroad on the mission field constantly. And my first thought is, “Where can we find $10 a month to contribute to this cause?”

A lot of times I’ll say yes to that service need or commit to that financial need because I want to help and because I take seriously the Bible’s commands for believers to serve others and take care of those in need.

In other words, I feel a responsibility as a follower of Christ to say yes all. the. time. Don’t get me wrong, I want to serve and help. But I am getting tired. I am getting tapped. I am starting to respond to emails requesting help with, “UGH! Why can’t others step up?” instead of, “Yes, I’d be happy to sacrifice my time and money to help the Gospel go forth once again.”

And that’s where Satan and my flesh both step in and battle each other for control of my soul.

Satan wants me to feel guilty for even considering not serving or giving this one time. “You can always find $10 more and one more hour to donate to a worthy cause…. but you don’t want to… you don’t really love Jesus… you’re a fraud.”

My flesh swells with pride and says, “You already serve in so many ways! You LIVE at that church. You already give X amount of money to the church and missionaries and other charities. That 80% of the church members that don’t do or give jack need to quit being so selfish and step up! YOU do plenty. Sit back, feel proud, and refuse to do anymore!”

I don’t believe God would have me embrace feeling guilty or excessively prideful. He wants a different response from me.

But what?

As I think about priorities, I’ve been taught they should look something like this:

  1. Personal relationship with God (spending significant quality time with Him in prayer and individual study of the Scriptures daily)
  2. Family (spending significant quality time with them and making sure all their spiritual, emotional, and physical needs are sufficiently and exceptionally met daily)
  3. Occupation (accomplishing #2 requires money, and obtaining money typically requires working)
  4. Serving outside the home (inside the church, in the community, or abroad)

Jesus says the greatest commandment is to love God and love others. #1 and #2 accomplish that, and #3 and #4 can also be focused on that if we so desire.

The Bible also commands Christians to use their gifts to build up the church (Romans 12:4-8), serve others (Matthew 20:26-28), take care of those who can’t take care of themselves (Matthew 25:40), and share the Good News of salvation through Jesus Christ with others (Matthew 28:19-20).

Certainly, these things can be exponentially better accomplished if our #1 priority is attended to. If we have kids, the biblical commands to serve others, take care of those who can’t take care of themselves, and share the Gospel can ALL be accomplished within our immediate families as well (#2). Once our family members each enter into a personal relationship with Jesus, we’ll have to move outside of our families to fulfill the mandate to evangelize, but we don’t have to look too far: neighbors, our kids’ friends, their parents, etc.

Depending on your job, some or all of the biblical mandates can be lived out in our #3 priority.

And so our 4th priority is left as a kind of a catch-all. Whatever biblical commands we didn’t satisfy in priorities #1, #2, and #3, we can fulfill in #4. But if we’re not doing #1-3 well, maybe #4 shouldn’t be on our radar.

Maybe we shouldn’t use our time and money to serve outside of our family if we aren’t taking sufficient, no, exceptional care of our family with the time and money we have.

(Note: I am not talking about tithing in this conversation. I believe a 10% tithe is a non-negotiable no matter what state your family is in. When I talk about giving money in this article, I am only referring to giving above and beyond our tithe. (Leviticus 27:30))

All this to say, when an opportunity to serve or give comes our way, we should disregard Satan’s attempt to make us feel guilty and our flesh’s attempt to make us feel prideful and look at our priorities. Before we commit to service of our time and money, we should ask ourselves if we’re spending enough alone time with God, if our family is getting the best physical care we can give them (fast food is toxic, ahem), the best emotional support and spiritual training we can offer (this takes TIME), if our family has enough money to take care of itself (if not, consider using your extra time to get a J.O.B. before volunteering for something else).  If we can answer yes to all these things, and we still have time and money left, by all means, serve and give.

But if serving and giving means these other things suffer, even if these other things suffer because you are emotionally and physically exhausted from all the serving and the giving you’ve been doing, STOP IT! Cut back. Give yourself grace. Know that God understands. Know that God loves how much you desire to pay more attention to your relationship with Him and to take better care of your family He’s given you as a gift and responsibility.

Give yourself permission to set some limits. And give the 80% a chance to up their game ;)

One Question You Should Never Ask Yourself

Oct5

image via Lifeway.com

This semester I am teaching James a la Beth Moore, and let me tell you, it’s not for the faint of heart. James is a pretty blunt guy who doesn’t seem to put up with any excuses.

Thursday we were discussing the infamous faith and works verses the made Martin Luther want to tear the whole book right out of his Bible.

The verses say this:

“…faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by action, is dead. But someone will say, ‘You have faith; I have deeds.’ Show me your faith without deeds, and I will show you my faith by what I do. You believe that there is one God. Good! Even the demons believe that–and shudder. You foolish man, do you want evidence that faith without deeds is useless? …You see that [Abraham's] faith and his actions were working together, and his faith was made complete by what he did. You see that a person is justified by what he does and not by faith alone. As the body without the spirit is dead, so faith without deeds is dead,” (James 2:17-20, 22, 24, 26).

A woman in my group brought up an interesting question. She said she often wonders, “Am I doing enough?”

My initial response, and the response I gave in class on Thursday, was we all kind of know intuitively whether we’re doing what we can or we’re slacking off. If we’re honest with ourselves, we can answer that question. And if we are still unsure, we can ask friends if they think we’re doing enough. Sometimes outside parties can evaluate that kind of thing more objectively than we can ourselves.

As I thought more about it today, though, I wish I could go back in time and answer the question differently.

She didn’t express it this way, but I think what the woman was really asking was, “Am I doing enough for my faith to count?”

And that is a dangerous question.

It’s a trap.

It’s a trap set for believers by the Devil himself, hoping it will cause us to spiral into uncertainty about our salvation and how we got it in the first place.

It’s a question Jesus doesn’t want us to answer because He doesn’t want us to even consider it.

We cannot earn our faith. We cannot do enough to make our belief in God salvific. Only one thing saves us – the whole-hearted belief that Jesus’s holy blood more than makes up for our sinful choices.

If I can be so bold as to speak for James, I’ll say he never intended his letter to make believers wonder if they’ve done enough to earn Heaven. Rather, James challenges us to consider where our affections lie.

If we really love Him, we will love the things Jesus loves. We just won’t be able to help it. We will care about the widows, the orphans, the less-thans, the outcasts, the lost, and the otherwise broken (read: everyone). Our hearts will be drawn to them, and we will compulsively serve them out of our affection.

If we don’t really love Him, though, we won’t care about the things Jesus loves. We’ll care more about ourselves, our loved ones, and that’s about it. We won’t be moved to service unless it’s convenient or sporadic or somehow beneficial to us. Our affections will lie within.

Jesus is not interested in the quantity of our good deeds. He’s interested in the heart behind them. Never ask yourself, “Am I doing enough to make my faith count?” Instead, ask yourself, “Why am I serving?”

Align your heart with His, and your faith will count.

Prayer = Service

Aug28

I’ve been considering the idea of prayer as an act of service the past couple of weeks.

There’s no telling what got this idea rolling in my head. In fact, I’m not entirely sure it’s my idea. I may have heard it from Kennon Vaughan and mistaken it as my own. If so, thanks, Kennon!

Either way, I like it. Prayer as an act of service.

“Service” isn’t real palatable to most of us. “Being served” is more up my alley than “serving others”. I make lots of excuses for why I can’t serve if someone asks me to serve in a way I don’t want to.

I can’t volunteer in the church nursery because I am around kids way too much as it is – my sanity depends on me not serving in children’s ministry.

I can’t help at the local food pantry because my children are too young to bring with me. They’d just get in the way. And it’s not like I have free childcare available anytime I want it… … … (please don’t mention the 4 grandparents, the aunt and uncle, or the numerous friends that would gladly watch my kids while I serve somewhere…)

I can’t pick up trash around my neighborhood because eww. Yuck.

But prayer? as an act of service? Sure! I can pray on behalf of others. I do it all the time.

Well, not all the time. I mostly pray for myself, come to think of it. But if all I have to do to check the service box on the list of things Christians ought to be doing is pray, I can handle that.

Except my kids are too noisy and needy for me to get time alone to pray for very long. And when I do get a quiet moment, I’m more apt to fall asleep than pray for others. I can’t help that God made my body need sleep. And I need to take care of my body – that’s in the Bible.

Sometimes I get tired of my excuses. That’s when I know it’s time to change.

Why do we serve others? Because Jesus served us and asks us to serve others (Matthew 20:28). Jesus’ love for us drove Him to sacrifice all for us. Likewise, our love for Jesus ought to drive us to serve others sacrificially.

And praying for others is a sacrifice. It takes time and mental fortitude. We must make it a point to pray for others – it doesn’t just happen naturally. We have to prioritize prayer if it’s actually going to get done.

Intentionality. For others. Effort. Sounds like service to me.

I can serve the street children in Ethiopia by praying for them.

I can serve the missionaries in Uruguay by praying for them.

I can serve my church by praying for it.

Who will you serve through prayer today? How can I pray for you?

Lose Yourself

Jul16

God has been trying to teach me something huge the past 18 months.  And, in pure human fashion, I have been slow to learn.  It got to the point where a couple of weeks ago I more or less pleaded with the Lord, “WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO TEACH ME?!  I DON’T GET IT!  MAKE IT CLEARER!”

And because God loves me, He did.

He has spent 2 weeks making it perfectly clear that I am selfish, and it’s time I change.

Through scripture, sermons, Bible studies, friends, and the Holy Spirit, God has been gently but clearly saying, “Life isn’t about you.”

I suppose He has been saying this for the past year and a half, but I’ve been hearing it as a polite opinion instead of a non-negotiable fact.  Most of the time opinions go in one ear and out the other.  What really gets my attention is someone with a megaphone 3 inches from my face belting out, “LIFE IS NOT ABOUT YOU, KELLY!”

God is too polite to go that route himself, but preachers often do it for Him, and I am thankful for that.  Because the majority of my American life tells me life IS all about me.  So I need someone louder than the noise of the world and of my own selfish nature to get my attention.

Philippians 1:21, it turns out, does not read, “To live is Kelly, to die is gain.”  No, “to live is Christ…”  The very point of our existence is to glorify Him, not satisfy ourselves.  Every choice we make should be with Him and furthering His agenda in mind.  Where we live, what we do with our money, how we spend our free time…  We are to live every moment with Him in mind.

Philippians 2:3 doesn’t say, “Do everything out of selfish ambition and vain conceit.”  No, “do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit…”  Not one single thing!  NOTHING we do should be motivated by what’s in it for me.

Gonna brush your teeth?  You shouldn’t do it to have a pretty smile; you should do it to take care of the body the Lord has given you.  Gonna apply for a higher position at work?  You shouldn’t do it so you’ll have more money to buy more things you don’t need; you should do it to have the opportunity to bring a Christlike influence to more people in your company.  Gonna have that third kid?  You shouldn’t do it because you have two girls, and you really want to have a boy; you should do it because you are committed to raising children who love Jesus and make an impact in this world for Him.

The rest of Philippians 2:3 doesn’t read, “In hubris consider yourself better than others.”  No, “in humility consider others better than yourselves.”  Not equal to, not the same as, but better than you!

The elderly person driving 20 under the speed limit in front of you?  Better than you.  Your spouse that won’t clean the bathrooms?  Better than you, too.  Your boss that drops huge projects on you at the last minute with no regard for the 1,000 other things you are in the middle of?  Also better than you.

(Ok, they aren’t actually better than you, but you’re to act like they are, per scripture.)

Jesus said if we want to follow Him, we have to deny ourselves (Matthew 16:24).  He wasn’t speaking in some spiritual hyperbole.  He wasn’t referring to abstaining from things for piety’s sake or to earn religious points with God.  He was referring to serving Him and others with our whole beings.

Because Jesus knew what we/I often forget.  LIFE IS NOT ABOUT ME!  It is about the King of Kings and Lord of Lords.  This whole circus we call life is for Him – to know Him and to make Him known (John 17:25-26).

Let’s operate through that filter today…  and every day.